RANTS AND GRUNTS 02

Nice (sometimes) Gets You Nowhere

Murphy was right when he said, “Never argue with a fool, people might not know the difference.” The problem is, will the fool ever know that he/she is one?

Last wednesday, January 28, I had the misfortune of being trapped in a futile debate (or should I say, very heated argument) with a person from a government agency (must not mention the name and agency lest I make someone (in)famous inadvertently). Our argument had to do with the formulation of HIV prevention programmes for migrant workers, which is something I have been involved in for the last ten years. And in those ten years of HIV and AIDS activism, of having forged constructive and productive partnerships with various communities and institutions (both private and public, local and international), I never had a face-to-face collision with someone who was incomprehensibly intransigent and obstructive (wait a minute, what am I saying, yes, I have encountered such people, but not in the context of my work). I am not a confrontative person; anger management experts would never earn a single cent from me.

It’s not that I don’t get angry. I do. But I never let it take over me like a malevolent spirit. You know how other people appear to be perennially shrouded by a black cloud (literally) – or a very dark aura – as my esoteric and spiritually-inclined friends would often say. These people often have a dark, unpleasant and obnoxious disposition – like the world is their boxing ring and every person they encounter is a potential adversary or threat.

I will not replay the dialogue (or should I say, wrangle) here, as it still annoys me to no end. I will, in the next coming weeks, find a way to constructively provide feedback and information to the institution where that person works.
Actually, I just wanted to write about this incident to illustrate that finally, and for the first time in my adult life, I can now comprehend the expression, “nagpanting ang tenga”. Literally, I felt intense, burning heat creeping out of my ears. It was a bizarre sensation – like I was Mt. Pinatubo waiting to explode.

Fortunately, there was divine intervention – in the form of my friends and colleagues – who admonished me to keep calm and refrain from indulging that person’s tireless tirades. And so, with eyes rolled and a slight smirk plastered on my face, I muttered under my breath, “Frankly my dear, I didn’t give a damn”. And I did my most casual walk away from that fiend.